2022 is ours.

1.05.2022


"Yes, we have a long way to go,
but we have already come so far.
Here’s to breathing deep
and making the most
of where we are."
- Morgan Harper Nichols

For many of us, the COVID-19 pandemic has compelled self-reflection. I write with certainty that the past two years have challenged and transformed my values, priorities, and perspective. 2021 may have been one of the hardest years of my life; the past ten months in particular plunged me into what could feel like an endless series of personal emergencies, health scares, and losses.

I know that I have not been alone in feeling grief, worry, and fear. I see that my community has felt deeply in the past year. And so I write.

I write to the military family that survives the husband and father taken from them by the virus; to the high schooler who craves connection after months of isolation; and to the teacher who smiles at every student while praying for his own child’s health. I write to the woman who returns to work after experiencing a miscarriage; to the young man who wonders if he can find a job after graduation; and to the young woman who quarantined alone on Christmas. I write to the immigrant’s daughter who juggles classwork with caring for her family; to the college student who tackles 20-credit semesters to graduate on time; and to the girl who isn’t sure when she can see her family again. I write to anyone who feels like they are enduring alone. I write to myself, and I write to you, dear reader.

Wherever you are, I want you to know that you are not alone.
 
Today I am celebrating us. We are still here. Look back, and see how strong we are.





(Hello! I hope you are well. Yes, this is my *umpteenth* return from hiatus to our little corner of the Internet. I've missed you.)

Traditionally my New Year’s recaps on the blog have included my favorite books, posts, and memories from the year. To kickstart, 2022, though, I want to dedicate this space to recognizing six things that have brought me strength during this past year. I share to reflect on what I want to carry with me as I grow into my twenties and in the hopes that maybe you will find strength here, too.

1. I find strength in expressing gratitude. 

Recently, I’ve tried to make a habit of listing things that I am grateful for. Last semester, I started my mornings with this practice to reflect on the events of the day before and to hunt for the good. The things I wrote didn’t have to be big; texts from friends, sweet apples, nabbing my favorite window seat in the cafeteria, and “comfy baggy jeans” (written just like that) have all graced my notes. 

A favorite thing I want to share with you that made the lists nearly every day: sunrises. It sounds so cheesy, I know. But regardless of whether that night had granted or refused me sleep, the sun rose to greet me every single morning. I saw some gorgeous, gorgeous sunrises this semester.



I admit: after the hardest days, sometimes all I could write was that I made it through. But on the brighter days, striving to become more intentional about expressing gratitude allowed me to find beauty in the ordinary. In these moments, I could see that every day I live can be beautiful.

 

2. I find strength in the collective.

 


In times of hardship, it can be easy to feel alone. Conversations with friends and engaging with my community (as well as getting straight talk from my mother) reminded me that loss and grief exist alongside joy as inherent aspects of the collective human experience. This is not to discount the reality of the things we endure. Sometimes, life is painful. Sometimes, life sucks. But I find strength in admiring how those around me persist, in finding listening ears and connections that make me feel seen, and ultimately in remembering that even when life sucks, we endure together.

 
3. I find strength in stories.

 


I promised to save my favorite books for a future post, but I would be remiss to neglect the strength that stories lent me (I am, after all, a book blogger at heart). Some of these stories were spoken: mentors and friends embraced courage to share their experiences with me. Some were heard: I resonated with another young creative's podcast, where she discussed the challenges of rediscovering herself in her early twenties. 

Others were written: books never fail to bring me comfort and make me feel. I love fiction because it transports me to new universes while grounding me in the emotions and perspectives of a character like or unlike myself. Nonfiction receives me in a different way. In addition to the escape fiction promises, the reality of nonfiction again reminds me of our resilience. 

 In particular, breast cancer memoirs provided me with strength last semester. I read a handful of them for a Women’s Disease seminar. I was amazed by the women authors’ honest writing, their authenticity, and their ability to transcend their individual experiences to call for collective change. Despite having different experiences, I resonated with some of the emotions they described and admired their strength in their willingness to be vulnerable.

One of my favorite quotes comes from The Cancer Journals by Audre Lorde, who self-identifies as a Black feminist lesbian poet: 

 “I had felt so utterly stripped at other times within my life for very different reasons, and survived, so much more alone than I was now. I knew if I lived I could live well. I knew that if the spark of life kept burning there would be fuel; if I could live I would always find a way, and a way that was best for me.”


4. I find strength in our ancestors.

 


This thought is more a spin-off of the last note than its own point, but I feel heartened when I think of how we stand on the shoulders of those who came before us. A passage in a book I started recently, My Own Words by Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Mary Hartnett, and Wendy W. Williams, made me reflect on this idea. In a piece entitled, “From Benjamin to Brandeis to Breyer: Is There a Jewish Seat on the United States Supreme Court?," Ginsburg reflects on how her Jewish background and her identity as a woman would once have made becoming a Supreme Court Justice impossible: 

 “What is the difference between a New York City garment district bookkeeper and a Supreme Court Justice? One generation my life bears witness, the difference between opportunities open to my mother, a bookkeeper, and those open to me.” 


This passage compelled me to think of my own mother, who confronted pressures to get married rather than pursue college, and my grandmother, who never had access to a high school education. Their strength and resilience enable me to dream of things for myself that were once impossible— maybe even inconceivable— to them within the confines of patriarchal and parochial societies.
 

5. I find strength in myself.

 


I find strength in my endurance and in our human capacity for resilience. Look at how far we can go,  and still come back and grow. 

I am learning to love myself for who I am. Still, even the journey brings me strength. As one of my professors put it, a true sense of belonging is not something that can be derived from others. Instead, “belonging is something we carry within ourselves.” I am starting to find that feeling for myself.

6. I find strength in hope.

 


Barack Obama’s keynote address at the 2004 Democratic National Convention and 2006 publication popularized the idea of “the audacity of hope.” I can’t recall what reminded me of the phrase, but recently I’ve found strength in thinking about its meaning. The fact that, even in hardship, we can hope for something different or new or better is something incredibly powerful to me. The experience is a uniquely human one. It takes courage to hope. And so long as we can hope, whether we are conscious of it or not, we live with strength. 




I can’t explain why, but I have hope for this year and for us. To anyone reading this, I hope that you are doing well and being kind to yourself. 

I have hope that we can continue living with strength. I write it into existence: 2022 is ours.

34 comments :

  1. Happy New Year, Claire. Thank you for visiting my blog.

    I love this post. Yes, life is hard now due to the pandemic but we must persevere and survive it. Your choices are healthy and sound. I wish you and the rest of us luck.

    P.S., I met Ruth Bader Ginsburg when I was admitted to the U.S. Supreme Court many years ago. People have no idea how physically small she was.

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    1. What an amazing experience to meet RBG in person, thank you for sharing with me. I can also remember being surprised by her stature the first time that I saw her photographed next to the other Supreme Court justices. Still, her legacy looms large.

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  2. What a beautiful post, both in the message and the photos! Happy New Year, Claire!

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  3. The photos are so beautiful, and this is a great reminder to practice gratitude, especially now. Happy New Year!

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    1. Thank you, and wishing you a happy new year Samantha :)

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  4. "the past ten months in particular plunged me into what could feel like an endless series of personal emergencies, health scares, and losses."
    Ugh. I'm sorry to hear that. I realise you've been away for a while now. I hope the painful circle is now broken, and good things are awaiting for you!

    Thank you for such an inspiring post. And those pics are so pretty and calming.

    Happy 2022! I hope to see more of you in the new year 🙂.

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    1. Thank you Roberta. I hope so too :) and I look forward to reading more of your reviews and interacting with you more in this lovely book community this year as well!

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  5. Awesome post. I'll second the expressing gratitude thing. Whenever something good happens, I write it in my planner so I remember it when I'm looking back at past weeks.

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    1. Thank you Aj! So wonderful to hear that expressing gratitude has also brought you light this past year :)

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  6. Happy New Year! I also have hope in this year and I LOVE keeping a gratitude journal. It really helps with perspective and keeping a positive attitude. Thanks for visiting my blog!

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    1. I'm glad that keeping a gratitude journal has helped you, Cindy, and happy new year to you too! Right now I've just been keeping these lists in my ~ general ~ random notebook where I write a lot of random things, but I've been thinking about dedicating a separate notebook to gratitude this year.

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  7. Claire, this post came at a good time for me. The truth is, I'm worried right now. My OCD has made this pandemic and new variant even more anxiety inducing, and every morning I wake up worried. However, I am reminded of the good things, like how you talk about gratitude, and finding strength in other people who are going through similar things. The truth is, I am not alone. I also totally relate to mothers giving straight talk, I am very thankful for mine haha. Happy new year!

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    1. Emily, it brings me so much joy and solace to hear that my writing resonated with you in that way. Wishing you good things in the new year ♥

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    1. Thank you Kimberly, happy new year to you too :)

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  9. Beautiful post. It's really important to grab on to the things that bring us happiness or calm. Big or small.

    Karen @For What It's Worth

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    1. Thank you Karen ♥ Wishing you a happy new year.

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  10. I have seen a few sunsets, mostly pink ones and I enjoyed them. It's sometimes unbelievable that the earth still turns and we still sleep at night though chaos is in the news a lot these days. I wish you and everyone a lovely new year where we will all keep on and not lose ourselves or our hope for a better today and tomorrow.

    Have a lovely day.

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    1. Wishing you a happy new year too, Lissa. I think it's a beautiful and powerful thing to acknowledge how the world around us continues to move regardless of the circumstances of that day.♥

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  11. This was such a beautiful reflection! Best wishes for the new year!

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    1. Thank you Sam, happy new year to you too! :)

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  12. I also find strength in hope because without hope... things would just be horrible.

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  13. So true! Life is hard enough without the last couple years. Amd sometimes it IS the little things that bring us joy.

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    1. I think it is often those little things that make life worth living :)

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  14. Happy New Year. And what a beautiful post. It's definitely important to recognize and celebrate the small things.

    Lauren @ www.shootingstarsmag.net

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    1. Thank you Lauren, and happy new year to you too :)

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  15. This is such an inspiring post! I agree that it has been a tough time and it has become increasingly important to look for the good in life. Thanks for sharing your thoughts! :)

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  16. This post was lovely, and what a lovely way to try and return to blogging be looking at the things which gave you strength and help remind you that even during hard times you can make it through. And I love the pictures you've included with the post. I have tried a few times to start a gratitude log, it's too easy to focus on the negatives and you're making me think it is something I should try and do again. I'm glad even after the struggles of 2020 and 2021 you remain hopeful for this year. I'm trying to, but I feel like I need to keep my expectations low just in case. It does feel like we've managed to make it through so far and with the strength we've found in doing that will help us carry on.

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    1. Thank you for your lovely comment, Becky. What you wrote about setting expectations low because of the hardships of the past year resonates with me so much -- it can be hard to have hope for the future when things have been so tough. I can't do it every day. But on the days that I can, I try, and it is those days that I can that I try to look to keep moving forward. I hope that if you do decide to start a gratitude log this year that it becomes an outlet for joy :)

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  17. Happy 2022! These have been very challenging times. We have lost so much and many were forced to face impossible circumstances. I hope that 2022 brings joy to many.

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